Common Sense and Leadership

Everyone has their own view of a good leader. I think a good leader is one that can help you avoid the banana peel that will ultimately cause your demise.

One of the responsibilities of good leadership is to anticipate and resolve potential problems with clear cut solutions.

Deficits are among the concerns leader have to face and require firm hold on a budget in order to be able to pull oneself out of the mess, sometimes caused by inefficiency.

Three questions need to be asked that are important when making decisions regarding a negative budget. Is this something that I need? Can I make the process less expensive and how? Is the allocating of cash required to offset the need, justified?

A quick fourth would be where do we get the funds? Are we certain that the money is available and how long will it be? Is it enough to just say, "costs are going up everywhere, we need more money" or, is that a copout that leads to habitual unresolve and red-bottom lines. What I'm suggesting is fine-tuning. Sometimes it is a little of both, negligence and costs spiraling out of control. How do we look at cost? Is it based on what we spent last quarter, or season, with a percentage of increase? Or rather, is it our increased usage that has resulted in the higher costs. We must do the math. Then ask, what measures are we taking to correct the situation, if possible. Can the need for more money be a potential risk to your operation?

Overindulgence leads to inflated budgets and each area needs to be evaluated as to what is the cause and, is there a need? We should always ask, what can we cut out. For example, is this something we need, as sometimes change like consolidations, make items or methods obsolete. Business courses that I have taken teach-- "do the ends justifiy the means?" Never over extend especially, in an economy such as this is.

Survival is what everyone that I know in business is talking about right now. Some of the ways that they have dealt with increasing costs and low revenues is to cut down staffs hours, saving when they can, on utility expenses. Some have even changed their salary offerings, and have cut back on vacations and bonuses just to be able to hold on to their personnel. Others, have closed shop one addional day during the work week. Extra curricular activities have been suspensed, and at other times, events have been consolidated, with a realiziation of cost savings, all in an effort to reduce an inflated budget.

How do you keep from having a deficiency in the first place? A good leader has no deficiency in judgment, having a complete understanding of the cost at hand, vs the potential income having also an anticipation for increases and other needs like replacement costs. I knew someone that was so concerned about over-draft penatities, that she, not having the ability to reconcile her account, always made sure that the deposits were larger than the debits-- (checks written). She never bit off more than she could chew. I think that is sound judgement, keeping ahead by anticipating your need. We should all learn to "live" within our means, cutting back when we have to. Overextending has been the demise of several companies in this area, which in trying to grow too fast, failed. This is how we are to survive.

Look before you leap, what are you proposing to do and how much will it cost, and do you have the funds? Basic business procedure.....Before you attempt to grow something, how successful have you been? What did it cost you, and that means each and every detail and full exposure to every line item. How much more can you expend in it's development? And, is this a good time to do so. Will it break the bank. What is the risk? Is the risk worth it?

I heard that the cost of oil will be skyrocketing. I'm prepared to bring down the dial even more. My friend places plastic around her windows and even cuts drafts from around her doors. I use lined and thermo drapes, and door draft stoppers. Rooms that are colder, can be closed off. Outside walls are colder, furniture can and should be more centralized. Rugs against doors, and extra warm materials like carpet, pillows and throws absorb heat in a structure. Carpeting is warmer than hardwood floors. Electricity is at an all time high. Baking at night when the house is cold, as opposed to a sunlit day, is another way to add comfort without largely increasing costs. It used to be that you could set your tank to create hot water, at less peak hours. Making sure your humidity level is adequate, is another way to help. The list is long. Wasting water is also a huge concern in most homes as the cost sky-rockets.

It is the little things that add up. My mom used to be very careful about closing the door, right away, not allowing the heat to escape. Years ago, people used draperies to cut drafts in the home. Your probably all familiar with the canopy bed, the four posts and their coverings. She ran a line through the house to dry clothes. They do sell indoor clotheslines still. Have we become more efficient or have we become negligent and wasteful in our homes businesses and office. Efficiency is what needs to be acquired, and that means all of us must work at it, being on top of everything that we consume.

We can pay the fee of our errors or prevent it in the first place, by being frugal and watchful. This takes honesty and integrity, intellect, and determination to succeed, by righting the wrongs, and with clearcut directives, leading with strength. Eliminating or cutting back, will be necessary for most of us, business or not. It will require the use of the word No, which we do not for the most part, want to hear.

A good leader knows that it is not a good idea to increase costs when you have a deficit budget, and risk taking should be avoided at all cost. If you are a leader, then you know that leading is very difficult and sometimes places you in an unpopular role. A role, that may require all the courage that you may have. So ask yourself who is depending on you and lead with confidence, one step, one hour, and one day at a time.

By what you say

How will people remember you, perhaps, they will remember you by what you said, rather than what you did.

Thinking back a few weeks, my son told me that someone in the family introduced herself to him while he was working, and asked me if I remembered her. She was a cousin to my first husband, who I have not seen for many years. Back then, families were raised in the same neighborhood, and she remembered his dad well. We chuckled about the language that was used at the time, as they called people by pronouns like, Mac and Pal. Swear words braced the air regularly, leaving one shocked as to where a young child who attended Catholic school, could have acquired such language and get away with it. I recall him saying the nuns were F'n penguins and that, was when he was being kind. Could be a hint a relationship gone wrong. Maybe he got his knuckles whacked repeatedly because of his language. He knew every French swear ever created, and it did not come from his parents.

The point is, we are often judged by what we say and it is often what you said that is what someone will remember about you many years later. I still hear my mother and father's voices and their sayings which still ring clearly in my head to this very day.

The word is a powerful medium. My sons, even at a very young age, could repeat slogans that they heard in commercials and favorite movies and shows that they viewed on television. Even, perhaps, before they even understood what it meant, they were hooked.

My daughter-in-law and son guard their children from hearing words that they don't want them to repeat. Today, there is so much filthy language around you have to be careful where you take your children, at the risk of what they might hear, especially from other children. I call it "noise pollution."

Our society is falling fast when we allow "pollutants" to enter into our livingroom by our entertainment systems. One moment is all it can take to pollute the innocent mind. Once it is out, it may repeated. Mommy what is....blank? Words become visuals.

What we see and hear on television sets the moral climate of our existance, and there is no turning back. Over the years, producers have taken liberties, to promote that which gets noticed, (good or bad), there it is. Much that was not permissible years ago, now is flaunted shamelessly, without notice, in front of our faces. If you see it enough, after a while, it becomes acceptable and permissable, right or wrong. Victoria's secret is no secret anymore.

What do children hear and see in your home? Visuals are powerful messages, or sponsors would not be spending the time and money "to entice you" to look at them. What is the message? You need me, you want me, you've got to have me. We've all seen this, --children playing away from television, (having an open ear), will run to see certain ads or programs when hearing "catch sounds."

Yesterday, I learned about a show, which some call funny, humor which I find objectionable, and certainly not what I would consider a show for children. Yet, a child will be made to say words that children should not be saying at all, never mind in front of a television camera. It is said that children should be seen and not heard. That is a thing of the past. Children should be heard, and what comes out of their mouth is vitally important to their moral character, yours and others. What is important is the moral character of our children and young adults. What is important is the word, RESPECT. What are teaching our children?

What you see is what you get. Put a stop to it now, or who knows what is coming down the tubes tomorrow. Tell the sponsors that we will not support any company who participates in the demoralization of our children, family, and country. Do not wait until this plaque comes upon us, dealing with consequenses after the fact. Nip it in the bud now. In the words of one of my favorite hosts, "wise up."

What you say, how and when you say it .....does matter! We need new voices in America, ones that will stand up for decency and for a better tomorrow-- for us, and future generations to come.

Choosing the Road Less Travelled

Yesterday was one of the most beautiful days in January that we have had for a long time, with the sun so brilliant that if one didn't have the luxury of weather forecasting, would not have anticipated the storm ahead. This morning, as I write this post, there is a thin blanket of snow outside, one that is due to dissipate by afternoon when the temperatures are expected to climb to the forties. It is that way with life, always having the unexpected storm which lies ahead.

My youngest grandchild, Ryan and I enjoyed our walk yesterday, after bundling him well in the carriage, alongside his home. It was so peaceful in the wood, a road less travelled. We experienced the sounds that I love best, the peaceful sound of the many running brooks visable from the side of the road, having also heard many tweets from the various birds inhabitating the area. Ryan loves to observe all things and is as quiet as a mouse the entire time. I used to take Nathan around my neighborhood when he was little, but now, is all grown up at six and going to school. Nathan always wanted to see water drains and flags. Ryan loves to see doggies. A beautiful dog unrestrained, walked part way with us and Ryan was in his glory making noises that only dogs would understand.

Later, Nathan was greeted at the bus by his parents who planned it as a birthday surprise. Ryan, waiting at the door, was so excited to see his brother running up the driveway. He probably had been waiting for him all day. His mom, in her capacity at work, has the ability to be flexible with schedules and sometimes even works at home. Dad had his usual day off, Wednesday, like golfers. I enjoyed watching him open his birthday gifts, ones that Santa forgot to bring him on Christmas, Nate thought. They are very lucky boys being raised in a beautiful loving family. A road less travelled today. I am glad to have had the opportunity to be with them, on Nate's "special" day.

Ryan cried at the door looking out as I left to go home, as he has done in the past. Driving home, I thought about the many days ahead, that spring-like, we will go for many more carriage rides. As I drove on the road, less travelled, I thought about my own life. I had always been a person that did not do what was popular, and followed the narrow path, which led me to become Orthodox in my late thirties.

Orthodoxy, is my way of life. It is the road less travelled, one of peacefulness and gladness, and joy unspeakable, where there is so much love and hope. The Orthodox life is like the springs we saw from the road yesterday, sometimes having a little ice around the edges, but steams flowing evenso with the sun resting upon your head, crisp and clean. A refuge, amongst the throngs of life, and a refreshment for the weary traveller who is on the road less travelled. It is not the popular faith here, as in the world, yet. Numbers mean little to me.

I think it will be an early spring, I think...yet, somehow spring is always within me, an eternal spring.

The words of Jesus, taken from the The Orthodox Study Bible, (John 4:14)says... "but whoever drinks of the water that I shall give him will never thirst. But the water that I shall give him will become in him a fountain of water springing up into everlasting life."

Life depends on water. The quality of water determines your wholesomeness. This is the month we talk about the Baptism, and although there is a physical manifestation of water present, what happens is much deeper than the ocean. We are raised to "newness of life" our life in Christ, a "new birth" to a life totally intimate and a continuous communion with our God.
It is a rite of passage, given by Christ to the Church, as an entrance into the Kingdom of God and eternal life, having died to our former self, we are transformed and united to Christ, that we may have life though Him.

I wonder if the kings hat that Nate wore home from school, along with the sticker on his chest would be as appealing at the age of lets say, sixteen. Somethings are a kind of given, are we know that he most likely would find it an embarrassment at that age. There are things left to be discovered "later," like how much God loves him like we do.

How far will man fall

Christ came to redeem fallen man. The state of the fallen man has always been evident by his lack of care for others and through his quest for destruction. Christ did come and He saved us from death, showing us the way and giving us Commandments that lead to life. We have churches, sometimes called hospitals, to help us learn wholesomeness.

The first commandment taught to us is to put God first and to love him above all else, and loving your neighbor as yourself. Are the created goods we now have, and many commonly used for ways of communication, taking something precious from us. The use of them may allow us to engage with more people at once, and worldwide, but at the same time, they are impersonal. Interaction, face to face with a human creation has become sometimes frightening to some, as it discloses much in a way of understanding the other's feelings, and sensitivities. Hidden over emails and telephone prompted messages, one avoids the needed contact to fully understand and receive the full picture by the response of another. Prewritten at times, we can divulge as much or as little as we care to. We are afraid to be made known, or to be hurt. And we can hide the truth sometimes, that way. It makes confrontation that much less painful at times. The bible is clear about it. All hidden will be revealed.

Things are different when you must look into the eyes of another. It's like looking into their soul, making it more difficult to hurt or ignore their need or request. Especially, if you love them. We are called to love our neighbor. God does not make junk people, everything has its full intention, unbeknown to us.

Some of the problems that now have risen because of our choice in the use of technology, is in the way mankind can no longer communicate with real people. Conversation is an art, it is something that we must learn. Years prior, people were better skilled at listening to others, and responding adequately, sometimes, in just a passing hello, or a quick how are you doing? Greetings are necessary even in a world so technologically advanced. Can you see ones smile over the internet? Do not underestimate the importance or the warmth of what can set you aglow for an entire day. It is "normal" for people to be people. Remember what a famous song taught us, "people who need people are the luckiest people in the world." It is good to hear someone's voice over the phone, but you can't see them.

Why have we become impersonal? Is it a crime to have feelings, when it is that which makes us human? Are we afraid of our own humanity? How far and how fast is mankind falling? Are we aware of it?

Are you becoming out of touch, and maybe "out of reality". I watched a show last night that sickened me. It was about men who sadly could not interact with real women, and in their desire to share their life with someone, and in some cases more than one, because of their own failure, inability to communicate, have artificial creations to fill their loneliness. These dolls, are their pleasure and "they do not talk back." Some call them their wives. I don't think that was God's intention for mankind. It is more than a sick perversion, it is a form of idolatry, (that which has been created on which the affections are passionately set). A breaking of the very first Commandment. It can also be other material things, like money, or cars, maybe even sports. What or who do you worship?

So how are we doing with human communication? It is said that hearts of many will grow cold. Are we there yet? Maybe it's time that we become "real" again. Oh! bye the way, have you hugged your child today? If you are not concerned by what you just read, reread it, and get away from your isolation and go and greet, hug someone before its too late. Human interaction is what is "normal." Are you at the stage of abnormal, yet? All to often we are taught, look but don't touch. Some people are having trouble discerning real from artificial.

Sometimes, we ignore things we shouldn't. And because we fail to see it for what it is, other's catch on, and it becomes the norm. Become enlightened, the truth will set you free.

Put an end to this coldness....

Getting Over Yourself

Can you fool yourself, as you do others? You can learn to fool yourself, by getting over yourself, if that make any sense at all?

I guess, what I'm trying to say is that you can learn to "overcome" by tricking your brain. For example, if your hungry for something, lets say chocolate with all those wonderful fat calories and exotic flavorings, you can settle for a low-cal, hot chocolate product, or something that you like, instead. The aroma says that you have just had a wonderful chocolate treat. So it's not a candy bar, but by all means it worked. Changing the mind, and doing something else instead...sometimes works.

You can make yourself feel as though you were as happy as being at the beach, by surrounding yourself with artifacts, shells and beautiful paintings. Sounds of the water hitting the shore, can be purchased, which can lull you into feeling a sense of deep relaxation. The mind may settle for that, instead.

In my shyness, I never felt comfortable reading or singing in front of crowds. I guess it is a secret that most people do not even know about me. I get the job done. This is how I found the way to do it. Once, a monk from Connecticut told me, that feelings are not as important as the mission. Such concerns stem from pride. It matters not how I feel, but what I do. So, what I do, is to keep my eye on my goal, not even looking at the crowd. There is no crowd... I tell myself, but just Him whom I serve.

In December, a group came to sing at our church. The leader had a speech impediment but apparently, the brain could not stop the most incredible voice I've ever experienced in Orthodox music, from flowing from his heavenly voice. He has apparently learned to ignore "self" for the greater good, knowing, "it is not about us."

Recently, the Community program which I have served since it's inception, is becoming fine-tuned. I applaud the effort going forth. It takes a special person to deal with the suffering of others wanting to help those in need. The climate has always been a happy one, one of feeding others, not only with food, but with conversation, and in a caring, creating an atmosphere of joy, hope, and good will.

Just greeting someone with a smile that needs it, often transforms the inner soul of the lonely, forgotten, and hurting person. It says you need not suffer alone, I care. Then there is the "hug."Some say, "where's my hug?" I have come to understand the power of the human embrace. There are others who will say, "don't touch me," and, I understand that as well. It is a scientific fact that babies that are held, do better than those who are not.

How close do you really want to get to someone? Do you want to know their problems? Can you put on their sufferings, without carrying them yourself, as you ponder their tears, and pain, over and over in your mind? Are you the type of person that is strong enough to listen and walk away, unblemished. Or, will it scar you, becoming another slash mark on your own throden down body, one consumed with its own cross to bear. How do you bear anothers burden without it affecting you? You can't, unless you become "selfless."

How do I handle the stress of seeing other's suffer? I try to let go of it, by praying for them. Some people have learned to handle this better than others. It requires a great deal of strength. There is no fooling the brain here. It is telling me, don't go there without giving this a whole lot of thought.

Can you really get over how you feel about others? Still working on that one. You may be able to fool the brain, but not the heart.

Do You Hear What I Hear?

Do You Hear What I Hear? said the Night Wind to the Little Lamb. It just occurred to me that we are not all in that state of awareness. A state where all nature speaks out to us and we are no longer blind sighted, like Paul. Once the shackles are removed from our eyes, we become "new creatures" and can both see and hear. Who are we that have tasted this newness of life? We are Christians. We have put on Christ and are enlightened.

Maybe you did not get the message proclaimed by the angels. He who was born in a "secret cave", is no secret anymore for He has been made Manifest. There was the Voice of one called, John the Baptist, crying out in the wilderness, proclaiming preparedness, John's baptism was of repentance.

When a storm is coming, we can see signs of it and we prepare. John knew that Jesus was coming, and said that "He coming after me is mightier than I, whose sandals I am not worthy to carry. He will baptize you with the Holy Spirit and fire." (Matthew 3:11)

Jesus approached John, coming from Galilee to be baptized, and John recognized Him. It is not odd to know that John knew Jesus, as John was aware of His presence even while he was in his mother's womb, and lept at His appearance, even while Jesus was in His mother's womb. Yes, life begins at conception. John tried to prevent Him from being baptized saying, "I need to be baptized by you, and are You coming to me? (Matthew 3:14).

Only a slave would carry a King's sandals. Here was the King of Kings, coming to be baptized by John, and, because of the baptism of Jesus, we are baptized with the Holy Spirit and fire. (It was the Spirit of God who hovered over the water at the first creation). Jesus, at His baptism santified the waters and all nature.

The images in the hymns reveal so much. The waters saw Him and were afraid and turned back. The clay (John) to the potter, (Jesus) "why do You command me to do what is beyond me; for I rather should be baptized by You." (taken from the stichera).

"The streams of the Jordan received You, "their source", and the Comforter descended in the form of a dove. He who bowed the heavens now bows His head. He who covers the heavens with clouds is Himself covered today by the streams of Jordan. He who takes away the sin of the world is cleansed, that I may be made clean. The only-begotten Son of the most high Father receives from above the testimony of the consubstantial Spirit."

For the great feast we hear the following:
"John saw You coming to him in the Jordan, O Christ God, and he said: "You have no uncleanness, O Lord, why do you come to Your servant? In Whose name will I baptize You? in the name of the Father? But in Yourself You bear the Father. In the name of the Son? But You Yourself are the Son incarnate. But by Your breath You can give the Spirit to the faithful." O God Who shone forth, have mercy on us!"

The elements knew Jesus and so did John, (The Word incarnate, made flesh coming to be baptized).

Taken from the Troparion of the Feast: "When You, O Lord, were baptized in the Jordan, the worship of the Trinity was made manifest. For the voice of the Father bore witness to You, calling You His Beloved Son; and the Spirit in the form of a dove confirmed the truthfulness of His word. O Christ our God, You have revealed Yourself, and have enlightened the world, glory to You!"

The Trinity has been revealed to us. The voice of the Father, (taken from Matthew 3:17) came from heaven saying, "This is My beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased." The Holy Spirit came in the form of a dove to anoint the Messiah, the Son of God, the Holy Spirit always rests on Him.

On Sunday, we were annointed with holy oil, after being blessed with holy water, a reminder of our own baptism and our new creation, having put on Christ.

John tells us in (Matthew 3:12) "His winnowing fan is in His hand, and He will thoroughly clean out His threshing floor, and gather His wheat into the barn; but He will burn up the chaff with unquenchable fire." The figure of the winnowing the threshed grain from the chaff is a metaphor for divine judgment, which always separates good from evil." (taken from the Orthodox Study Bible ).

The Orthodox believe, that there can be no salvation apart from Christ, making Baptism a requirement, in the name of the Trinity.

(Mark 16:15) "And He said to them, "Go into all the world and preach the gospel to every creature. (16) He who believes and is baptised will be saved; but he who does not believe will be condemned."

(Romans 10:17) "So then faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God. (18) "But I say, have they not heard? Yes indeed. "Their sound has gone out to all the earth, and their words to the ends of the world."

I have to wonder why people today are not in belief of the Sacrament of Baptism, and in not coming to church, place their unbaptized children in great peril. Have they not heard, or do they not understand?

The Best Gift of All

I was sitting here, pondering about "what is the best gift", having come to the end of the year, and through the start of another year, which began with a church service, and off to a cozy restaurant with friends. It was the same restaurant that my husband and I used to enjoy, years ago while dating, because of its romantic atmosphere, and great food. Then, I recall ordering strawberry daiquiri's, as calorie counting was not the objective. We would sit at our favorite table, right in front of the fireplace. Our gift to each other was always friendship, and lots of laughter. We always enjoyed being together, and through the years, although the menu has changed some, we still frequent that quaint restaurant, from time to time.

Last night, I was watching television, a program called hoarders. Obviously, it is a sickness, like the extreme, of being too clean. We all would like to think of ourselves in the middle of that, somewhere like clean enough, but able to accumulate a few favorite things. I heard over and over, that most of the hoarders claim the problem is that they don't have enough space to store the collectibles. Again, it is clear that when you have a problem, your the last one to see it or admit it. Some had infestation of rats and droppings, and still would not believe it was because of their disorder.

Lately, I've noticed that some of my church friends are cleaning out their over abundances to share with those who have not...a very good idea. I usually do that in the fall, and end up buying more to replace whatever I got rid of. Mostly, I find it is because nothing "fits" as the body consistently changes in measurement. And, I admit, I am a person that likes change. Not major changes, just "color" changes, like curtains and throw pillows.

Coming back to the hoarders, the one things that they cannot give up is their children, and once they see through the caring social worker's help, how much harm is being done to them by their creating "the pigpen" atmosphere, they begin to change. Sometimes, it's at risk of losing their most precious gift, their children, through state intervention.

This month is the month where some of our friends will take their annual bus trip to Washington DC, in an effort to do their part in "saving unborn babies" from destruction. Their combined effort in saying to lawmakers, is "we are still here" and we, more now than ever, need your help in overturning laws that should have never been on the books in the first place. Killing infants is not the answer...Just like hoarding is not the answer to "solving problems."

Just having come from the season of celebrating the "birth of Christ" we implore you to not take the road of Herod, in the killing of the innocent, but instead, know that it is through the birth of children that we find the "Best Gift of All."

Today, I read that one women practically stood on her head, being bed riden, not to miscarriage, once again, and she delivered a beautiful daughter, prematurely. Sometimes you have to go to drastic measures to get what you want. We will never stop thinking about the injustice done to those babies lost.

Children are priceless. It's time you see them for what they are, beginning from conception on up. If the hoarders can see how precious children are, and you can't, what does that say about you? God does not create junk. Life is invaluable.