Can you fool yourself, as you do others? You can learn to fool yourself, by getting over yourself, if that make any sense at all?
I guess, what I'm trying to say is that you can learn to "overcome" by tricking your brain. For example, if your hungry for something, lets say chocolate with all those wonderful fat calories and exotic flavorings, you can settle for a low-cal, hot chocolate product, or something that you like, instead. The aroma says that you have just had a wonderful chocolate treat. So it's not a candy bar, but by all means it worked. Changing the mind, and doing something else instead...sometimes works.
You can make yourself feel as though you were as happy as being at the beach, by surrounding yourself with artifacts, shells and beautiful paintings. Sounds of the water hitting the shore, can be purchased, which can lull you into feeling a sense of deep relaxation. The mind may settle for that, instead.
In my shyness, I never felt comfortable reading or singing in front of crowds. I guess it is a secret that most people do not even know about me. I get the job done. This is how I found the way to do it. Once, a monk from Connecticut told me, that feelings are not as important as the mission. Such concerns stem from pride. It matters not how I feel, but what I do. So, what I do, is to keep my eye on my goal, not even looking at the crowd. There is no crowd... I tell myself, but just Him whom I serve.
In December, a group came to sing at our church. The leader had a speech impediment but apparently, the brain could not stop the most incredible voice I've ever experienced in Orthodox music, from flowing from his heavenly voice. He has apparently learned to ignore "self" for the greater good, knowing, "it is not about us."
Recently, the Community program which I have served since it's inception, is becoming fine-tuned. I applaud the effort going forth. It takes a special person to deal with the suffering of others wanting to help those in need. The climate has always been a happy one, one of feeding others, not only with food, but with conversation, and in a caring, creating an atmosphere of joy, hope, and good will.
Just greeting someone with a smile that needs it, often transforms the inner soul of the lonely, forgotten, and hurting person. It says you need not suffer alone, I care. Then there is the "hug."Some say, "where's my hug?" I have come to understand the power of the human embrace. There are others who will say, "don't touch me," and, I understand that as well. It is a scientific fact that babies that are held, do better than those who are not.
How close do you really want to get to someone? Do you want to know their problems? Can you put on their sufferings, without carrying them yourself, as you ponder their tears, and pain, over and over in your mind? Are you the type of person that is strong enough to listen and walk away, unblemished. Or, will it scar you, becoming another slash mark on your own throden down body, one consumed with its own cross to bear. How do you bear anothers burden without it affecting you? You can't, unless you become "selfless."
How do I handle the stress of seeing other's suffer? I try to let go of it, by praying for them. Some people have learned to handle this better than others. It requires a great deal of strength. There is no fooling the brain here. It is telling me, don't go there without giving this a whole lot of thought.
Can you really get over how you feel about others? Still working on that one. You may be able to fool the brain, but not the heart.
1 week ago